Show-accurate toys available, Hasbro rep: "Oh, you guys wanted those?"



Images surfaced this week of upcoming My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic toy sets that will be released, that, to the shock of the entire fanbase, are actually show-accurate and do not look - as one observer says - "like a total pile of shit". The attention to detail and non-half-assed design have many fans excited, albeit totally perplexed, as this is the kind of thing they have been begging to spend money on "since day fucking one".

A spokesperson for the toy company had this to say:

"You guys wanted show-accurate merchandise? Well why didn't you say so earlier!"


Among the released images are playsets for Sweet Apple Acres, Rarity's Carousel Boutique, and even the Super Speedy Cider Squeezy 6000, which allow fans to act out their favorite episodes "for the first fucking time in half a decade".



The spokesperson expressed total shock and bewilderment at the response to the proposed products.

"We thought you guys LOVED pink Celestia and the stock-molded blind bags." he said, looking through his feedback notes from the last 5 years. "Next you're going to tell me that you would have preferred a pony movie first instead of Rainbow Rocks, ha ha!"


Inside sources confirm that Hasbro has little faith in these masterfully crafted playthings, and as such they will probably have a limited run, in favor of another product that they're sure will "fly off the shelves"; this misshapen Rainbow Dash doll, that is pregnant with her own cutie mark symbol, and whose forehead comprises 40 percent of her body mass.

At press time, the representative was quoted as saying "oh come on you guys are just messing with me" upon being informed that fans would have in-fact preferred a pony-movie before Equestria Girls.

Comments (10)

  1. People who prefer pony over Equestria Girls are retarded.

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    1. where can I subscribe to your memes?

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  2. > Make show accurate toys
    > Use worst two characters for initial run
    > Sales tank
    > Hasbro says "told you so," goes back to making shovelware-quality toys

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  3. Ha GGGGGaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy

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  4. Movie-accurate Equestria Girls dolls when? (3D models of them already exist.)

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  5. "Why didn't you say so earlier?"

    BECAUSE *YOU* NEVER *BOTHERED* TO LISTEN, HASJEW!

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    Replies
    1. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xECUrlnXCqk

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  6. The kids are too much happy when we provide them with a collection of toys. If they are supposed to be entertained more, then surprise them more with the types of toys and placing them in the appropriate state.

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  7. It's about damn time, only took Hasbro 5 years to finally do it.

    But still they look like shit. Those hats don't even fit properly they just look like they're floating on their heads.
    Would it kill has bro to make quality show accurate toys? I mean fuck people have 3D printed better looking models than these.

    I have money damn it, 5 years and you still don't want it badly enough.
    At least make AJ look better that hat is too small. And why does she look angry?

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