Horse News

Seaquestria Fest Exposing Everything, Scapegoats To Hide Ineptitude

Seaquestria Fest is exposing everything!

Seaquestria Fest (or SQF) is a hippogriff fandom convention in the middle of nowhere, Ocean City, Maryland. Attempting to capitalize on the open wound left in Maryland by BronyCon's departure, this upstart con decided it'd be a good idea to host their event over 100 miles from the nearest major international airport. That was just the first sign of their ineptitude. The most recent is their exposure of the details of every staff, vendor, panelist, volunteer, musician, etc. application via open Google Document links.

William Shatner, voice of Grand Pear in My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic is leaving divorce court victorious. Shatner has won "all" the horse semen in his settlement with his fourth wife Elizabeth, with whom he separated last year. The couple's divorce was filed in December and settled shortly after.

Shatner's ex-wife will keep their homes in Malibu Cove and Versaille, Kentucky but it is clear who really came out on top. Shatner is entitled to the semen and breeding rights of 2 horses "Renaissance Man’s Medici and Powder River Shirley". He also gets to keep the "equipment used for breeding" as well as 2 dogs according to court documents.

Anons on /mlp/ showered loads of praises on Shatner for his success.

The Zebra Issue Isn't Black and White

Editor's note: Here we present yet another article from yet another anon on this topic, because why not and we obviously don't have any real content to publish and this is better than nothing I guess. But seriously, I think this'll be the last one. I'm 90% sure.

Now, I'd like to preface this article with a bit of introspection. Privilege is a very foreign concept to me, especially after having met so many different people in my short 9 years in the fandom. Coming from a background with a black father and Asian mother, whose resources were taken by hurricanes and internment camps respectively, I still meet people with fair skin and supposed privilege that have lives far worse than mine. I sincerely hope that one day we can follow in Dr. King's words and finally set this racial butthurt behind us. Be you white or black, Asians imperial or jungle, we were all once kangs 'n' shit.

Just Get Better Jokes: Clout, Comedy, and Cancel Culture

Editor's note: This is a response piece to an editorial submitted by a valiant and brave anonymous writer entitled Implying Slavery In Pursuit of Clout.

Let's begin with the title in and of itself, because it speaks to the stunning lack of self-awareness the writer will proceed to portray throughout the rest of the editorial. What the author is attempting to do is to portray anybody who has even a slight criticism with tired, racist jokes as a clout-chaser just doing it for attention. Unfortunately this logic doesn't hold up on several points: chief of them being that everything is done for clout on social media.

Editor's Note: This article is an OP ED fan submitted counter argument by Silver Eagle, in response to the previous OP ED on the same topic.

Man, remember 2012? Those were simpler times. Pony was a paradise back then, when we all bopped along to Avast Fluttershy’s Ass and did the Gangnam Style dance in unison at cons. There was no politics, no factions, no drama, no callouts. We were all one happy family, loving and tolerating each other.

I hate to break it to you, but it was doomed from the start.

Implying Slavery In Pursuit of Clout: An Anonymous Op-Ed

Editor's Note:This article was sent to us by an anonymous member of the community. We lack the required testicles to have written it ourselves.

This image has been altered to remove any signs of racism

The comedy writer is like the conscience of the king. He's got to tell the truth. And that's my job, to make terrible things entertaining.

Such is the challenge of a comedian, and usually people who complain about it being 'problematic' and 'extremely subjective' are the least-funny people around. It is true that comedy can be subjective, and far more importantly comedy can simply be unfunny. However, in terms of the latter, people have tried to unpack the reasons behind what makes something 'unfunny.' Comedy is far from my expertise—though I'll indulge in it like a drunk at a bar (or while drunk at a bar)—and I'll not pretend to be a specialist in it nor speak with any great authority; but I have noticed a trend over my life that's worth submitting for the reader's consideration: The people who complain about comedy and those who make unfunny works are not only virtually the same; they are the most tone-deaf, unrealistic, horribly sensitive, weak-willed people you'll find.

I have to start off with that little piece because what I'm writing about today plays into this. I'll refrain from any further waxing on the nature of the subject or delve into anything unrelated and just keep it straightforward to tell what happened, though I'll sprinkle some further quotes from this one comedian to keep things in mind. That being said, let's get the quick rundown of what happened: a funny horse artist decided to do a big meme for his horse artist friend for his birthday and Twitter got mad.

PostBot: New Pony Info from TV GuideRequested RSS Feed Not Found

HorseNews PostBot-Mark II here, bringing you the latest My Little Pony News from TVGuide.com. They posted something about pastel horses and we know that's your thing. Check out the details below, and wait for those lazy bums to come edit this to make it relevant.

Here's the Latest from TV Guide

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from TV Guide: Bad RSS Request http://www.tvguide.com

Horse Game Updated - Now with VIOLENCE

Horse News is not dead yet - and neither is Horse GAME. They've just released a Combat Demo for the ongoing ambitious video game project. It looks cool as hell. Check out what they have to say.

Bronyscot 2019 Hearth's Warming Interviews Dump. More to Come in Update.

Exclusive: Sara Richard Leaving MLP Comics, Tony Fleecs Libel Action

Comic Catchup at Bronyscot 2019, November 9th, Glasgow

Descendant of Salem Witch Gets Badgered by Idiot Obsessed With Orangutans...
Mr. Fleecs Responds to Allegations of 'That Old Prospector'

Okay, okay, so it's only a hiatus, but we have to clickbait as we aren't the bigger press outfits like Equestria Daily... although the biggest press outlets like the Daily Mail need to... creative tax arrangements don't come cheap. Anyway, Sara spoke to us about her upcoming work up to issue #90 of the comics and, now that Clover Press dropped The Book of Oz, chock full of her illustrations, they're thinking of a second release. SO HIT THEM UP if you want further adventures. More videos from #bronyscot to come, and our chat from August with Sara and Tony Fleecs is in the video description. Follow us at #ponytv and @HorseNewsMLP

We got to talk to Jesse Nowack, voice actor of Seras from Hellsing Ultimate Abridged, Red from Fist Master, and a load of roles in Pokemon Abridged, all from Team Four Star. He also had some advice for voice actors in the middle of a transition of gender, having been there himself. He had to redo lines, such as Red's, but he was able to work it all out. This video contains lots of apes, you have been warned. Chelis was directing this video and as we all know is obsessed with Simpsons memes like Dr. Zaius... so is Duke as well, so he has no right to complain, but still.

The Sonic the Hedgehog fandom breathed a sigh of relief this week as an updated character model was released for the upcoming liveaction movie that was a remarkable improvement from the previously released version. The brain trust at Hasbro, following their lead, did the complete opposite of that and released these images which are a steaming pile of Teen Titans Go.

The future of My Little Pony is bright, but that light at the end of the tunnel might be an oncoming freight train. Look at this bullshit.

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