Cringe Corner: AudioWave Dasher

Windows Movie Maker is a surefire way to know you're in for a ride.

In the five years of this fandom's existence, we have seen many musicians come and go. Some have been outstanding and left a lasting impression, while others have left people scratching their heads wondering, "just what in the hell were these people thinking?" - What would a Cringe Corner article be without another one of the latter artists, who goes by the name of AudioWave Dasher?
I first got wind of this guy when he was bitching on some Spybook Facebook group, over how he tried submitting his song into Equestria Daily, and that he was rejected. Without listening to the song itself at first, I figured it had to have been for reason that EQD does get a lot of fan-submissions daily, and for them to sift through that stuff on a daily basis can't be easy, and his work was just brushed aside. After personally hanging out with a few of the EQD guys at BABscon, I learned a few things about how they operate their site, such as their reliance on things like automatic post timer queues for most of their filler articles, and the scores of fan submitted content that gets placed in said queue, with the exception of time sensitive data. I would soon learn just how wrong I was, in assuming that his stuff was brushed aside amongst all the rest. It was flat out rejected. "How could this be?" someone might ask. Well, let's take a look at his work below.


The video starts out innocently enough, with a decent looking, albeit long animation of cute horses being cute. This promptly cuts to 30 seconds worth of really drawn out titles, from "20% Cooler Productions" and other things that just scream originality. Finally, the song itself starts around 40 seconds in, after which I was greeted with some awfully familiar sounding chord progressions and barely audible, garbled attempts at singing. The vocals sounded like a mixture of tone-deafness set to two tracks that were "pushed" to both the left and right sides, with a lot of reverb. It was garbled so much, that in order to follow along, I had to read the lyrics to get the general idea of what the song was about.

Top Notch Lyrics.

Things were about to take a turn for the worse, when the chorus started, bringing along with it some horribly compressed distortion effects. It's almost as if the guitar distortion was recorded, and put through another distortion track, and repeated again. So, about 3 layers of autism distortion, all compressed together into one track.

Alone, this type of thing wouldn't be very noteworthy. It's one thing to make bad music in the beginning and then improve later on. In this case, that hasn't happened, with many other instances of completely off key singing, and the same kind of lyric structures and time signatures - and AudioWave Dasher claims he has over 20 years experience making music. But it's quite another thing altogether, when he calls upon the group to actively spam all of the emails associated with Equestria Daily, in order to get his music pushed in. Because we all know just how effective spamming and harassment are to get your message across, right?

"Please help me to get Senpai-sama to notice me!"

Did someone order a plate of "My Shit Don't Stank"?


"There's no way in hell my music is terrible!" - naïvety at its finest.

While I personally feel bad for the guy, if this is what you have to show after 20 years of making music - I can honestly say with absolute certainty that you're going about this the wrong way. You don't need a $10k studio, all you need is to not be tone-deaf, and not to abuse the ever loving shit out of compression or SOUNDGOODIZER. And you certainly need not try to get a bunch of people to spam another site with emails just so you can push around your music. "I will badmouth them in a positive way, until I get what I want." - please.

"A lot of people use the same power-chord progressions! What are you, a tone-deaf pleb?"

Anyone who has ever owned a Youtube channel learns right off the bat, that it's pointless to argue in the comments section of it. That lesson, among other things, was clearly never learned.
While I can understand, even sympathize with the fact that a lot of the fandom's music is mostly electronic based, and that not many nowadays are willing to pick up a guitar/bass/drums/what have you, that doesn't mean that if you were to do so, you're automatically the next prodigy behind those instruments. You don't need a bunch of compression or a $10k studio to make good sounding music.


Comments (36)

  1. 10k studio? I have $100 microphone, $400 for a set of studio monitors (I got them on sale at $200), FL Studio (with a ton of amp sims and effects VSTs for tone sculpting), and my guitar (List Price $799 @ Guitar Center).

    Yeah, it helps to have some high quality equipment, just so your product doesn't render out sounding like it was recorded in a dumpster, but no amount of money buys the idea of the song or the writing ability.

    I recently got a song on EqD, so I guess I did something right with my song (I write deathcore btw, so there's not much to compare it to in the fandom)

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    1. About 6 months ago i got a song on eqd as a joke with a friend, i downloaded fl and through some shitty sony earphones and my complete lack of musical interest and talent i got a song on eqd and it still gets views to this day (about 2k 100 likes ish with 0 dislikes)


      Really really easy, their standards are rock bottom.


      I have no knowledge of music theory at all obvoously because i couldnt give a shit about it.

      Delete
    2. Reaper is a acid like DAW that is pretty much free (aside from a nag screen). It's very easy to use. That with an audio interface, guitar cable and guitar rig is all this dude really needs to make his guitar work sound better as he appears to mostly do guitar. So looking at maybe 400 dollars, 100-150 for cable and audio interface if pirating guitar rig.

      Delete
  2. >tfw the /mlp/ vocaroos sound better than this guy's singing

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  3. I bet you guys couldnt write a better track in a week if you tried.

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    1. Seriously, other musicians (myself included) would say that one week is giving us too much time. Anyone with a decent music IQ would be able to throw something together within 8 bars of picking out music, and twenty years would be more than enough to develop such an IQ. I'm not hearing any of it.

      We had challenges on /mlp/ to write a piece of a song in an hour or less. This guy needs to step up.

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    2. Then prove it. write a track

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    3. Yeah I probably couldn't, and that's why I don't. Just because I can't do better doesn't make this good.

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    4. Gee, I guess I should eat this turd sandwich and like it since I'm not an experienced chef.

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    5. You don't need to make music to know shit when you hear it. Just like one doesn't need to make movies to know a shitty movies when you see one. That's an incredibly weak argument, OP.

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    6. i wrote a better song with less cringe in 15 minutes, you whiteknighting cumsponge

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  4. Replies
    1. pretty busy there with all of your animations I see petey

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    2. Actually, once or twice daily, Pika petey makes his rounds, going around copying and pasting his catch phrase. He's probably got it so streamlined, it only takes a minute or two to do, depending on how many sites are in his 'poopie loop'.

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  5. All I have is a relatively cheap USB microphone, Audacity, my Yamaha keyboard, and basic music knowledge. And I could make something that sounds better than this.

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  6. audiowave dasher sounds like a zero talent pussy who songs are shit (20 years of experience my ass) and is a hypersensitive man child look for his fucking adult diaper and attention for egd and anyone else he can get his hands on

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  7. I'm impressed that my personal email is on this guy's list. He's sent me like... Two or three emails ever.

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    1. I like how kind you guys are at saying someone's terrible at music and too busy harassing everyone to realize it.

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  8. having 20 years of experience does not make you a better musician.

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  9. Except Patrician actually sounds good when compared to this shit.

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  10. Some people are doing music for the fun of it, others are doing it to improve and sometimes get help from others in comments (like for "work in progress" stuff), other are doing it also somehow for horse-fame because they knoww they are doing ok stuff... and then we have people just picking randomly something and going all-in trying more harder to "gather hoarse fame" than actually getting decent at their art. Ugh.

    Like internet-fame is helping people, uh, look at tumblerinas. "Horse-fame" is even worse in terms of audience per musical artist these times, and it doesnt gather that much girls (or even guys).
    My diagnostic to this person : start a tumblr !

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    Replies
    1. Bigger fish in a smaller pond.
      >tumblr
      >willingly going to that SJW infested shithole, ever.

      Delete
  11. Gentlemen, the Drawponies of music.

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    1. Naw, cuz, people would pay for Drawponies's shit since it didn't suck. No one would pay a red cent for this fucking trash.

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  12. He complains that EqD are snobs because they have standards, while feeling like just being a musician and giving them the occasional pageview means that they automatically owe him exposure for his shit music. It's uncannily like some of the anons here, and how they'll cry about snobbery and egotism from horse-famous nobodies when they think they're being ignored. It's an incredibly entitled attitude.

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  13. Again, exploiting peoples problems instead of helping. gg

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  14. This is hilarious. A bunch of teenybopper high schoolers hanging out on a trash pony cringe site because you dont have any talent of your own. This website is like the enquirer for losers, except you're purposely trolling for cringeworthy material to fullfill your cringe quote and start flame wars. You're all automatically certified music critics because you have an opinion so you're qualified to judge someone's work. Excuse me, but fuck you. If you had something negative to say, then why dont you have the balls to pick up a guitar and do a youtube video of your own song and post it right fucking here. Because you're a joke. You couldn't make it as a guitar hero much less a pony prodigy. EQD and a bunch of sell outs and canterlot hill plays repetitive EDM tracks, bad remixes, 8 bit videogame music, and badly made out of tune covers. And on top of that they're still trying to cop off everfree's old celebrity station identifications. This is fact. Please, someone have the balls to pick up a real guitar and post a video. I double dog dare the shit talkers on this site to do something other than dig through other people dirty laundry

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    1. You have no business criticizing this site or EQD unless you're able to run a site that's better. You're shit-talking this site because you don't have any web development talent of your own. Come back when you have a better site up. You could call it "Pony Prodigy".

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  15. P.s. all this bullshit is from Rhe7oric, a hater and nothing more. You should be ashamed and embarrassed with yourself, because this is the exact opposite of what this fandom is about. CONGRATULATIONS, I didnt think the fandom had anything worse than cloppers. You dont slander other peoples work even if it isn't that good unless you have the balls to do better. And if thats the case you have no business trashing anyone lower than you anyway. This is a trash site that attracts trash trolls looking looking for cringe material to make fun of to make themselves cooler. Thats certainly a hell of a lit easier than picking up a guitar and putting me in my place now isnt it. Rhetoric you're a piece of shit with zero talent you get chump change for digging through my dirty laundry. Remember you'll always have sloppy 2nd's, but you'll never hold a candle to the real rock stars that more into it than just a pony song. Later douchebag

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  16. >Watches https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4DgU9FDWHYc
    >words appear at 1:20 min/sec in
    >"These words remind me of something"
    >http://www.hellogag.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/12/funny-image-105.jpg

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  17. What a scumbag... This ignorant person is FOLLOWING me harassing me and deliberately trying to slander my music career. He was reported to the guitar center singer/songwriter competition staff for unprovikingly harassing my channel and has been banned from making comments on my youtube channel

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  18. i wonder if he's still here

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  19. AudioWave Dasher. A douchecanoe with a guitar. You know something, pal? Playing a guitar doesn't make you a musician. Singing doesn't make you a musician. Insisting you are a musician doesn't make you a musician. Experience doesn't make you a musician.

    You are not a musician, Ben Jackson. A true professional musician isn't afraid of criticism, and doesn't react like an angry child when faced with criticism. You act like you're a self-made rock star because you recorded yourself and posted it on YouTube. What you really are, Ben, is a talentless asshole. You don't know how to make anything you record sound better than someone with a microphone could make by strangling a chicken for five minutes. And you cover up your continuing lack of understanding the difference between noise and actual music by verbally abusing anyone who points out that what you call music is just noise.

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  20. Youre right! HN is the laughable shitshow of the pony fandom, and @Rhe7orical_HN is losing credibility, viewers, and attention so he reaches out to low hanging fruit. Well here ya go Rhetoric, you can grab these low hanging fruit. 8===========D This vile scummy troll needs to get a talent and a hobby other than being a scuzzy leech on the fandom. Please disregard this VILE VAPID CUNT as nothing more than an internet attention craving thirsty whore. DISREGARD EVERYTHING THIS CUNT SAYS

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