"Science Experiment" goes terribly wrong - Meet the "Jar Project"


It was a story we've known about for a few days, but were too busy posting Comic Drama to pay too much attention to. Now that Horse News has finally come out of our Thanksgiving Food Comas, we bring this to you; a science experiment gone terribly wrong. The image you see above you is real. It features Rainbow Dash congealed in a mysterious brown substance in a glass jar.

That substance, is human semen.

For quite some time now, the "Pony Cum Jar Project" has been going down in the shadows, with one anonymous man collecting all of his ejaculations in a jar, containing a Rainbow Dash toy. This week, the man was horrified to find that the jar, which had been stored too close to a heat radiator, had evidently caramelized the glucose in his semen. The resulting stench was reportedly too unbarable to continue the "project".

The OP of the thread from Thanksgiving day says that he "nearly vomited" when attempting to retrieve the specimen. The renowned scientific authority observes that the toy was basically "boiled in cum" by the heat of the radiator.  How the man plans on continuing with his project is uncertain, but he assures followers that he "will not let them down".


To give you an idea how long this project has been going on, here are some earlier photos.



Nice to know the man in charge is also a dedicated Dr. Who fan.



Posted Sunday, 30 November 2014 at 8:50 pm
Labels: , , ,

Comments (47)

  1. Anonymous30 November 2014 at 21:16

    This makes little sense. Ejaculate is a suspension, if it sits long enough the semen will float to the bottom leaving a relatively clear liquid. Yet in these pictures it appears quite cloudy.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anonymous30 November 2014 at 21:21

      Have you never seen the 4chan semen bottle guy? he's the authority on what jizz looks like over time

      but also, this semen was boiled, meaning it was all in-motion due to heat

      Delete
    2. Anonymous3 December 2014 at 15:40

      dont forget that jesus isnt real.

      Delete
    3. Unknown24 August 2015 at 23:36

      Neither is abraham lincoln or joseph stalin

      Delete
    4. Ashtre19 September 2017 at 15:36

      You watch your whore mouth.

      Delete
  2. Anonymous30 November 2014 at 22:45

    Holy shit, that is vile.

    Never change, /mlp/.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Anonymous30 November 2014 at 23:23

    I fucking love you guys (no homo) but christ, this is too much.

    Now excuse me while I take a chlorine shower.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anonymous1 December 2014 at 00:22

      >so insecure he has to put "no homo" in there

      Get a load of this faggot!

      Delete
    2. Anonymous3 May 2015 at 04:44

      The confused little boy crying faggot at innocuous comments on the intent says 'insecure' far more than the OP.

      Delete
    3. Anonymous3 May 2015 at 04:46

      *internet

      Delete
    4. Ashtre19 September 2017 at 15:37

      *intarwebz

      Delete
  4. Unknown1 December 2014 at 00:08

    He needs to get a whopping fat arts grant so he can continue his art and have it properly exhibited and curated in the greatest of today's modern art museums. His Daliesque, Thorneycroftian approach to popular culture speaks of its fecundity; his semen, the vehicle for the conception and exponential growth of humanity, combined with Rainbow Dash, an "icon nouveau" of ambition and devotion for society's multiplicity of generations, from days-old infants to plus-centenarians, meld in vitro to illustrate the raw power of celebrity to captivate the proletariat and spread its influence, spawning memetically, just as spermatozoa and ova seek each other and unite to exert dominion over the cycles of life and nature.

    Or he needs a shrink and meds, because that is fucking gross and colossally stupid.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anonymous1 December 2014 at 03:09

      >Or he needs a shrink and meds, because that is fucking gross and colossally stupid.
      So...
      Like any other student that goes to preppy art school. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FbuluDBHpfQ

      Okay.

      Delete
    2. Unknown1 December 2014 at 03:37

      Oh, come on, now. Dance Compagnie Marie-Chouinard is one hundred million million million million million million million times more profound and entertaining (in an admittedly WTFLOL way) than some dopey guy wanking into a jar and letting it cook.

      Delete
    3. Anonymous1 December 2014 at 04:24

      I tried to find the one where a bunch of art students pray to a jar of mayonnaise or something and then bathe in it to be more close to home, but alas.

      Delete
  5. Anonymous1 December 2014 at 11:08

    And yet all I can think is that somebody must have really been bored out of their mind.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Anonymous1 December 2014 at 13:00

    I am at a loss for words, because my mouth is full of vomit..... Thank you, Cap...

    ReplyDelete
  7. Anonymous1 December 2014 at 13:13

    Piss Christ anyone?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Anonymous12 May 2015 at 05:39

      Thank you for mentioning this anon

      Delete
  8. Anonymous1 December 2014 at 14:42

    This is what happens when we spend too much time in hiatus.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Anonymous1 December 2014 at 16:48

    Brb Nopetown

    ReplyDelete
  10. Anonymous1 December 2014 at 20:37

    I know of an artist who collected his own semen and displayed it in a gallery on the lower east side of Manhattan about 2 years ago. Might this be the same artist? Mr. R.D., is this you behind this project?

    ReplyDelete
  11. Anonymous2 December 2014 at 01:29

    why can someone tell me why he did this in the first place

    ReplyDelete
  12. Anonymous2 December 2014 at 03:48

    BRAVO LARSON

    B R A V O
    R
    A
    V
    O

    ReplyDelete
  13. Anonymous2 December 2014 at 10:48

    This is terrible. OP has it all wrong. He came OUTSIDE Rainbow Dash, and not just once but over and over and over again. How could he have gotten it so wrong?

    ReplyDelete
  14. Anonymous2 December 2014 at 15:59

    Not the grossest thing I've ever seen anyone do by a long shot.

    There is a thing that is sometimes done by members of a certain gender-based ideology. I've seen photos of women trying to keep their period effluence in a jar. I've seen photos of using the effluence in baking food that was intended for human consumption, using it to paint a photo, "freebleeding" (refusing to wear any kind of tampon to keep the mess contained and approaching sanitary), shoving a ball of yarn up their and yanking it out slowly as they knit something with it, and more besides.

    Compared to all that, this particular bout of curious idiocy seems very minor. At least it isn't a bodily waste product.

    ReplyDelete
  15. Anonymous3 December 2014 at 15:33

    In the words of white girls everywhere, "I can't even ...!"

    ReplyDelete
  16. Anonymous6 December 2014 at 02:27

    "Nice to know the man in charge is also a dedicated Dr. Who fan."
    Is that a hint for his next project? Will he attempt to entertain fellow Whovians with a sonic screwdriver that also doubles as a dildo? I don't even want to think this one through...

    ReplyDelete
  17. Anonymous7 December 2014 at 17:20

    Beats the cum and blood in blender modern "art" i saw in a modern art exhibition.

    ReplyDelete
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