Our Independence Day

Six months ago saw the birth of something beautiful. Something bold, and something final.

Anons everywhere were faced with the oppressive state of pastel-coloured horse-related media at the time. Where had the enjoyment gone? Were we destined to feed from the hands of egotistical bastards, to drink from their cesspools of brown-nosing? There was fun no more in Ponyland, and we all knew it.

Our collective faces when a new evil plagued the fandom.

And to top it all off, beings of darkness lurked every corner. Unspeakable horrors such as ass-devastated SJWs, and glute-annihilated quote-on-quote musicians, and posterior-disintegrated screw-it-I'm-naming-you, Final Draft, among an endless sea of splergelords, be they bronies or anti-bronies. What hope was left? Would we let these beings be the visage that represents us as humans? We were none of those, and yet we were tarnished by their hatred and lust. We hated that, especially from our little, honest and completely safe-for-work home that will always be /mlp/.

The odds against us, we set out with a goal to kindle a flame that had sparked inside of us all, and we were not alone. Those who dared to hop on this new endless ride we were creating did, and together, we created Horse News.

It begins.

Word got out of our mindless and perhaps hopeless endeavor, and many came to us all along the way. Through word of mouth, we recruited those of like minds to us, and we grew. Shattering our own expectations, we became a new hope for those of us who hadn't the pleasure of tasting delicious tears.

Never again would we be hungry, because there was oh so much drama to be had. We would be sure to find that which was previously unspeakable or unacceptable, and instead, share it with everyone. Together, you and I would feed the flames instead of putting them out, because that's the way it should be. Together, you and I would consume oceans of tears, because that is the only thing that will quench our thirst.

We knew drama. We know drama.

Oh yeah, and happy Independence Day.

I'm not even American.

It's not ogre yet.

Comments (13)

  1. Oh you cheeky Commie fucker.
    Happy Explosive Flag and Murder of Millions Day to you too.

  2. Lol I knew that clip would be used. Horse News a cure to sperglord pony musicians and analysts. The SJW the non-clop drawfags. This, this is our independence.

  3. The hiatus drama will only get worse from here. It is gonna be fantastic.

    And, oh yeah, happy independence day, Amerifags.

  4. Whelp, blew out a window and lit fire to my drapes and bedding already and its only 2pm here and I haven't even started drinking.

    Good thing I'll be going over to a friends place tonight or I wouldn't have a home tomorrow.

    Happy Independence Day horsefuckers.

  5. Long live Great Britain! God save the queen!

    1. Pop Quiz: what is the greatest gift to the world offered by Britain?

    2. Britain gave the world America.

      Little known fact: On July 4th, it is customary in British parliament to convene and have all the ministers draw straws, with only the PM himself exempt from selection. The man who draws the short straw has to personally go before the queen and flog himself repeatedly on behalf of the country and the throne. It's meant as a gesture of recompense to the rest of the world for unleashing America on it.

    3. Anon above has got it. Thanks to the overtly confident sentiments of Britain towards its colonies overseas, a group of manchildren threw a hissy fit against the ridiculous ruling of a king who wasn't present and threw his forces out, thus creating a land where freedom in the shape of a screaming bullet roams free.
      God bless 'Murrika.

  6. Source for this picture?
    I want to use it as profile pic, but creditz 'n stuff

    1. Couldn't track down a source, so I'd say just go for it.