The Babby Champions Derby: /mlp/ vs /toy/

Last Saturday, /mlp/'s 4chan cup team steeled themselves for a powerhouse of a team. In the past, /toy/ had proved their worth as a rival worthy of the titan /sp/, culminating in a bloodbath of a final in the 2013 Winter Cup. After a small scandal in the Summer Cup, /toy/ found solace in new manager Dawgamus Prime, who paved the way for Woody, Optimus Prime, and Madoka Titus to take charge and beat /fa/ in the 2013 Autumn Babby Cup for the team with the touch to take home their first championship.

Continuing their big win's hype, /toy/ was able to combat their Spring Babby counterparts and meet their every advance with the kind of hard plastic only Mattel and Hasbro know. The match was tentative at first, each side appearing unable to breach each other's defense. A few outliers here and there, most notably the three-strike, three-save Best Pony tête-a-tête with Ham Hands. At the twenty-third minute, Woody nabbed a goal past Derpy Hooves. Heart damaged, /toy/ took the advantage in the second half and charged on the low-morale team, enabling Optimus Prime to shoot another unassisted goal in the forty-ninth minute.

Safest hooves. Unsafe head.

The most dangerous lead, they call 2-0. Dangerous indeed. /mlp/ prides itself on its iron-hard goalies, namely Based Burdened and Derpy "Safest" Hooves. So much they pride the latter that scarves were made with her visage and name, proudly and defiantly to the rest of the 4chan Cup league. However, the nor/mlp/eople are quick to forget that, indeed, their star goalie is a wall-eyed mentally-addled horse. Optimus Prime, rolling out and down the pitch, attempted to put another goal in, found the post instead of the net. Over-eager about her appearance in the episode the week before, Derpy charged head-first into the ball, sending it into the net, earning /toy/ their third goal and sealing /mlp/'s defeat a meagre fifty-four minutes in.

In the aftermath of the match, /toy/ manager and general chill-ass motherfucker Dawgamus Prime had this to say,
"Well, Woody and /toy/ came out onto the pitch to do one thing, to stop the almighty horsefuckers.  Everybody knew it would a very hype match.  /toy/ is on a 7 win streak now, and I thought Woody would be the one coming out on top at the end of this one. 
If you look back at the babby cup, Optimus had a HUGE impact, especially because he was the main passing commander in the midfield, but I definately didn't expect him to get a goal (and another which he should have been credited with). If you look at the man of the match, My Nugga, he was definately a contender, he provided a good transition from the defense to the midfield.  I was hoping for a late Madoka goal to make it 4-0 because of Ante Up, to piss of Ken after he was absolutely rekking /mlp/, but sadly that didn't happen, it would have been hilarious."
Our men on the ground then asked about what Dawgamus thought of the future, more specifically, thoughts on which promoted Foetus and Babby teams would perform well in the big leagues this February.
"Well, /pol/ will definately be one of my favourites of the babby teams, especially since Rowan is stepping down from /fa/ and after him getting 2nd place in the babbies.  Other contenders that I can think of could be /y/ and /gd/.  I would have said /hr/ and /lgbt/, but they definitely aren't showing anything special in the friendlies, but I'll definitely be looking out for both, they could be contenders."
When asked for closing comments, Dawgamus smirked cheekily and simply stated, "This just proves gen1 ponies are better"

/mlp/ status: Told Story 3

A reminder to everyone that the draw for the 4chan Winter Cup is this Saturday, February 1st, 12pm EST, at, and the actual cup begins same time, same place, Friday February 14th.

Comments (8)

  1. I did in fact learn something by watching that friendly:

    I learned why some people hate Ken. I have two hypotheses as to why he was full AB/mlp/, and the next match of ours he does should rule out one or both of them.

    1. I think Ken once mentioned that he hated the fandom. This was a long time ago.

    2. Ken is just anally addled that brownies now attract more attention than his beloved furries. Commentating /mlp/ matches is a way for him to siphon off his autism. It's as simple as that, really.

    3. We'll get him a Spike-colored Dragon Dildo, and Ken will suddenly love /mlp/.

  2. Kens a fucking furry so duhh

  3. Why do all the players have different appearances? I liked their old look.

    1. PES14 is still fairly new. The player designs will improve with time, as more tools and hacks are developed for the game.

  4. Maybe if we win while Ken commentates, we should ask Boris to play "20% Cooler" instead of "Giddy Up" at the conclusion of the match as a nice little "fuck you, we know you got on Mr. Pones' Wild Ride, so stop being an ultra-fag for attention".

    Of course, if he's only hating because he loves attention, then this is feeding directly into his faggotry. So I dunno. It's *an* idea.