Plush humper gets off easy

In the Fall we told you the tale of Sean Johnson, the Florida man who was arrested after he bet on the wrong horse. And by that we mean he fucked it. In the clearance aisle of a Walmart. Well according to sources, he's getting off easy... And by that we mean his sentence isn't as bad as you might think.

Sean plead "No Contest" to the charges against him - which included "misdemeanor indecent exposure" and "criminal mischief". Instead of going to prison for a year (to be stuffed himself), he was ordered to pay $700 in fines. And he's also not allowed back in the Walmart obviously, and probably isn't allowed to contact the toy horse either. 

At a rate of $700, the incident actually cost Sean LESS than the $980 we were quoted for a single Rainbow Dash blow-up doll, which makes him a wise investor in our books.

Stay in school kids 

Comments (8)

  1. I dunno, a Rainbow Dash blow-up doll would last you indefinitely compared to a one-night stand with a generic toy horse at a Wal-Mart...

    1. He must get some serious thrills from his deprived actions. With inflatable pony girl you are alone with your degeneracy and shame.

    2. Factoring in the value of lost employment opportunities, social consequences and other such things, "serious thrills" doesn't even begin to cover it. For this to have been a net gain for him, fucking that toy horse must've been the very peak of how much pleasure a human can experience.

      Make no mistake, this man saw God in Wal-Mart that day.

    3. I aspire to the same level of spiritual completion that he was able to achieve in that moment.

  2. Jesus Christ he look sweaty as fuck XD. Imagine this picture was took, like, 10 minutes after he came into it! I hope he enjoyed it at least

  3. And I bet the pony was put down...