Obama Demanded to Resign for Being Brony

Earlier this morning, Senator Rand Paul (R-KY) added to his ever-expanding list of reasons why President Barack Obama should immediately resign from his position.

"I was doing a little research on the current President's background when I came across a rather peculiar picture that shows beyond any shadow of doubt that Barack Obama is not fit to lead this country," claimed Senator Paul in a super-secret interview with Horse News (that we mysteriously lost all 18 minutes of tape of).


The picture in question, as shown in the lost folder of evidence given to us by Sen. Paul, features President Obama holding what appears to be a Twilight Sparkle toy.

"Why would our esteemed leader be holding a pony toy if he wasn't a brony?" asked Sen. Paul.

Sen. Paul went on to list even more compelling he found using probably breaking-and-entering PATENTED HORSE NEWS INVESTIGATIVE REPORTING TECHNIQUES that seem to indicate the President is, in fact, a fan of the show.  Included in his evidence are multiple photographs of the President giving out "fist-bumps," better known in the brony community as "brohoofs."  Key pieces of evidence from Sen. Paul are given below:
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The President discovers MLP porn

Direct quote from the President himself

SUPER TOP SECRET EVIDENCE! HE'S TOTALLY WATCHING IT! BUSTED!
As for the impact of this report, Sen. Paul claims that there can be only one solution to this problem.

"President Obama must immediately resign from office," recommended the Senator.  "Even if he isn't a brony, we can't risk the terrorists getting hold of this evidence and interpreting it as a sign of weakness by the United States.

"The only way to ensure the safety of our nation is for the President to step down immediately."

Supporters of Sen. Paul endorsed these actions at a rally shortly after the interview, citing the Senator's vigilance and ability to think in the country's best interests as his greatest assets in possibly securing a 2016 election bid.
Supporters of Rand Paul 2016 at a rally
Most Anons, however, brushed off the news as being "questionable and not really that important."

"I really don't get what would be wrong with it if he does watch the show," stated one Anon.

"I mean, it's not like he's a Dashfag or anything."
Coming Soon: Horse News puts its patented "Investigative Journalism to the test to find out whether or not Bill Clinton had sexual relations with that cartoon horse.

Comments (9)

  1. Who did the photoshop? A 10 year old?

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  2. I did not have sexual relations with that horse.

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  3. This is the shittiest article I have ever read

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  4. face it hatters we got u beat

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  5. Bronies/pegasisters will take over the USA one day... <3

    ReplyDelete